Spotting and dealing with narcissism in the workplace

Most people will come across difficult workplace dynamics at some point in their career. Sometimes, it’s a colleague who constantly needs recognition, a manager who reacts badly to feedback, or someone who creates tension within the team through manipulation, blame-shifting, or control.

These traits can be tolerable at first. But if they become repetitive, they can begin to affect your teams’ morale, confidence, and sense of psychological safety across the workplace.

Conversations around narcissism have also become far more common in recent years, particularly online and in professional settings. While certain workplace behaviours may reflect narcissistic traits, it’s important to approach the topic carefully. Human behaviour is complex, and workplace conflict is rarely explained by a single label or personality type alone.

Word of caution on labelling your colleagues

The word “narcissist” gets used frequently in workplace conversations, particularly when someone comes across as arrogant, dismissive, controlling, or difficult to work with. While certain behaviours may reflect narcissistic traits, it’s important to be careful about assigning labels to colleagues or managers based on personal experiences alone.

A person’s behaviour at work can be influenced by many factors, including stress, burnout, insecurity, poor leadership skills, mental health challenges, or neurodivergence. In neuroinclusive workplaces, for example, some employees may communicate more directly, struggle with social cues, or react differently under pressure. Those differences can sometimes be misread as coldness, defensiveness, or a lack of empathy when that may not be the case.

Rather than trying to diagnose someone, it’s usually more productive to focus on observable behaviours and their impact on the team. If a workplace relationship is beginning to affect your stress levels, confidence, or mental health, speaking with a manager, HR representative, therapist, or employee assistance program (EAP) can help you think through the situation more clearly.

Managers can also support healthier workplace conversations by checking in regularly and by encouraging employees to access EAP services early, particularly during periods of conflict, stress, or emotional strain.

Spotting narcissism at work

Narcissism exists on a spectrum. Most people display narcissistic traits occasionally, particularly during stressful periods or competitive situations.

The concern usually comes from repeated patterns of behaviour that consistently prioritise status, control, admiration, or personal gain over collaboration and respect for others.

It’s also important to remember that workplaces aren’t the place for diagnosing colleagues. Only qualified clinicians can diagnose Narcissistic Personality Disorder, and many behaviours linked to workplace conflict can have other explanations.

Focusing on what someone does, rather than trying to define who they are, is often far more useful.

Behaviours that may raise concerns

If you’re dealing with narcissistic behaviours at work, you may notice patterns such as:

• taking credit for team achievements while blaming others when things go wrong

• reacting defensively or aggressively to feedback

• needing constant recognition or praise

• dismissing colleagues’ ideas or contributions

• creating rivalry within teams

• manipulating situations to maintain control

• showing little empathy during workplace conflicts

• behaving differently around senior leaders than peers or junior staff

Note that a single difficult interaction doesn’t necessarily mean much. Most workplaces involve occasional tension or personality clashes, but bigger problems usually emerge when behaviours become repetitive and begin affecting coworkers’ morale and sense of psychological safety.

When confidence starts to look like narcissism

Confidence is generally a healthy and valuable trait at work. Confident employees and managers can lead discussions, make decisions, accept feedback, and support the people around them without needing constant validation. Even in high-pressure environments, there’s usually room for accountability, collaboration, and mutual respect.

Meanwhile, narcissistic behaviours often involve reacting poorly to criticism, taking excessive credit, dismissing colleagues’ ideas, or shifting blame to protect one’s image. These behaviours can create tension, workplace conflicts, and emotional exhaustion within teams.

How to deal with narcissistic behaviours at work

Navigating narcissistic behaviours at work can be exhausting, especially when the behaviour is persistent or comes from someone in a position of authority.

While every workplace situation is different, there are practical ways to respond without becoming consumed by conflict.

1. Focus on the behaviour, not personality

When workplace tensions escalate, it can be tempting to label someone or challenge their character directly. In most professional settings, though, conversations are usually more productive when they stay focused on behaviour and workplace impact.

For example, raising concerns about communication, accountability, or team processes is often more effective than accusing someone of being manipulative or narcissistic. This approach keeps discussions grounded in professional expectations and reduces the risk of conversations becoming emotionally charged.

2. Set clear professional boundaries

Strong boundaries can help reduce emotional strain when dealing with difficult employees or managers. That might involve limiting unnecessary personal conversations, keeping communication concise, or confirming important decisions in writing.

Boundaries also help create consistency. If someone regularly shifts blame, dominates discussions, or creates conflict within the team, maintaining calm and predictable communication can prevent situations from escalating further.

3. Avoid getting pulled into workplace power struggles

One of the more difficult parts of dealing with narcissistic behaviours is the feeling that every disagreement becomes a battle over control, status, or being “right”. These dynamics can quickly become emotionally draining, particularly if you find yourself repeatedly defending your intentions or credibility.

Where possible, try to redirect conversations back to practical outcomes and shared responsibilities. Not every comment or provocation needs a response. Protecting your own emotional energy is important, especially in high-conflict environments.

4. Document ongoing concerns

If workplace conflicts keep recurring, documentation can become important. Keeping records of meetings, emails, agreed responsibilities, or repeated behavioural concerns can help provide clarity later, particularly if issues need to be raised with HR or management.

This can also help employees feel more grounded in situations where communication has become confusing, inconsistent, or emotionally charged.

5. Seek support early

Workplace stress can build gradually. Some employees don’t realise how much a difficult workplace dynamic is affecting them until they begin feeling anxious before meetings, struggling to sleep, or constantly replaying conversations after work.

Reaching out for support early can help prevent stress from escalating further. Speaking with a trusted manager, HR representative, therapist, or an EAP psychologist or counsellor may help you work through communication strategies, boundaries, and next steps in a more supported way.

When formal workplace intervention is needed

Some behaviours move beyond difficult communication and into bullying, intimidation, harassment, or broader psychological safety risks.

In those situations, formal support pathways may become necessary through:

• HR processes

• mediation

• workplace investigations

• external counselling

• legal advice

• union support

Final thoughts

Dealing with narcissistic behaviours at work can leave employees feeling emotionally drained, anxious, or disconnected from their work. While you can’t always control difficult workplace dynamics, you can take steps to protect your wellbeing through clearer boundaries, professional support, and psychologically safe communication.

If workplace conflicts are starting to affect your mental health, speaking with a therapist, a manager, or your HR representative can help you navigate the situation with more clarity and support. Early support often helps prevent stress and burnout from building over time.

For organisations looking to strengthen employee wellbeing, Talked offers a flexible PAYG EAP designed to make programs like counselling, psychosocial support, critical incident support, and other wellbeing resources more accessible. Employers can explore how it works or book a demo through Talked.